


Unspoken Words

by buildarocket



Category: Take That (Band)
Genre: 90's Music, Gary Barlow - Freeform, Howard Donald - Freeform, Jason Orange - Freeform, Love, M/M, Mark Owen - Freeform, Nigel Martin Smith - Freeform, Take That - Freeform, donage, robbie williams - Freeform, tt4, tt5, willowen - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-11
Updated: 2018-09-11
Packaged: 2019-07-11 06:05:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15966239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buildarocket/pseuds/buildarocket
Summary: Five lads all meet up for the chance of a lifetime: 'to be part of a boy band.'. They always say first impressions of each other last a lifetime... but there's something about that boy Mark Owen met outside that he couldn't quite put his finger on... perhaps it was the kind smile? The way he was quite a gentleman towards him? Or maybe it's something else entirely... something that would begin to grow over the years of touring the world together.





	Unspoken Words

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this fanfic with my very talented friend, the original version is on WattPad but I thought I'd share it here aswell xx

"Come on mum, you can go now!" Mark groaned when he noticed his mum still following him to his audition. "I'm old enough to go in by myself, you know." He huffed, turning his head from her and instead looking to across the street where he noticed a boy around his age seemed to be in the same predicament.

"Come on mum, leave it now!" He sounded just as annoyed as Mark did. He shoved his hands in his pockets as he crossed the road, heading over towards the club that Mark was supposed to be auditioning in. The thought then occurred to him that maybe he was also here for the same reason he was: the boyband that had been advertised in the papers recently.

Mark made his way over, warning his mum one last time to stop following him when he met up with the boy, giving a welcoming smile to him as he smirked at their situation.

"Hi." The boy said, stopping outside the doors to the club, Mark doing the same. "I'm Rob." He extended his hand for Mark to shake. Before he could do this, the smaller boy found himself taking each detail of this 'Rob' in front of him, everything from his dark hair to his pale green eyes; the way he held himself as though he was trying to appear casual, yet was pale and looked incredibly nervous to audition in the very near future. He was tall, much taller than Mark could ever hope to be, but he looked the same age at least, perhaps even a little bit younger.

Mark realised he was just staring at him after a moment and couldn't help his face dimming to a shade of red. He took Rob's hand and shook it, not losing his eye contact with him for a moment. "I'm Mark."

"Mark? Nice... you here for the audition or are you just having a row with your mum?" He asked cheekily, his smile showing his personality. Mark really hoped he was correct about him auditioning too, he really wanted to get to know him. "In fact, we should probably go in before my mum catches up."

He pushed open the door and, like a proper gentleman, let Mark go in first. They checked in at the desk, the woman there telling them to head upstairs and it would be the last door on the left. Both boys followed her directions, making conversation as they walked.

"Are you nervous?" Rob asked him, Mark nodding and sighing to himself. He was unable to ignore the growing feeling of anxiety that welled up with each step towards the office. "I'm bricking it, me."

"It was my mum that put me up to this... I'd rather go play football with my mates." He admitted. "I'm not a good singer or dancer if I'm honest. I don't know why she would even bother convincing me to do this."

"Aw, I'm sure you'll do great!" Rob supported him, Mark feeling grateful for that. Once again Rob opened the door and let Mark make his way in first causing the smaller boy to blush slightly but it went unnoticed.

The room was still spacious despite having a large desk with a comfortable looking, throne-like chair perched behind it and five cheap chairs scattered on the other. The walls were bare, only a few empty shelves were hanging miserably from it and an old-fashioned clock was attempting to fill a wall. In the far corner was a small desk, piled with paper and files, and an even smaller lady hidden behind it, busying herself with working through the towers of writing.

Suddenly, the door opened and two tall boys entered. They stopped and stared at Mark and Rob briefly before flashing a sympathetic smile as if to reassure them.

"Hey, you two!" Said the slightly taller one, he had blue eyes and dark hair which was messily curled on top of his head.

Nervously, Rob murmured a reply while Mark just stood transfixed.

"We ain't gonna bite ya know?" Said the other one. In fairness the two boys seemed quite menacing at first, that was until a grin would crawl onto their faces, making them look much more friendly.

"Don't mind him, he thinks he's really hard or summink," the first boy rolled his eyes at his friend, the slight movement of his head making a curl of his hair fall onto his face which he flicked away with a swoosh of his head. "I'm Howard by the way, and that one's Jason," Howard said, nodding by his head in Jason's direction. Mark noticed the slight lisp that Howard had shown while introducing himself, wondering if it would sound the same while singing, his thoughts interrupted by a voice next to him.

"Robert," said Rob confidently, glancing at Mark as a signal for him to do the same.

"Mark," this came out as more of a whisper, barely audible to anyone standing more than a metre away, the slight quiver in his voice recognisable.

No more words were spoken and the foursome took a seat. Seconds seemed to take ages to tick after one another and minutes seemed to take even longer. The time went teasingly slow, testing the boys' patience. And after fifteen long minutes, the door finally opened.

A blond haired boy and a man in his mid-thirties walked in, happily chatting with each other. Their conversation was interrupted when they realised that the four boys were watching nervously.

"Boys! You made it, lovely to see you all. This is Gary," the man said, placing a strong hand on Gary's shoulder, "we were just running over some lyrics".

Gary sat on the empty chair, nearest to the desk, his books were neatly piled on his lap and a few music sheets stuck out. He hastily smiled at the rest of the room before turning his attention to the man who had claimed his seat behind the desk.

"So, first things first, I'm Nigel Martin-Smith, probably Sir to you for a while. A few things before we begin," he glanced around the room for some kind of response and continued talking when he got none, "I just want to let you know that I'm gay, and if anyone else has anything to say, say it now,"

The five boys looked around at each other secretly hoping someone would break the deadly silence.

"I'm about to pee meself, can I use the toilet?" Rob smirked.

Mark, Howard and Jason sniggered while Gary just rolled his eyes, Nigel gritted his teeth and pointed at the ensuite toilet door.

Making as much noise as humanly possible, Rob shimmied his way to the toilet, while the rest of the room, except Gary and Nigel, tried to suppress their laughter as much as possible.

Once Rob had come back from his long toilet break. Mark couldn't help but stare at the way he fiddled with a loose thread in the cushion of the chair, his gaze dropped to Rob's fingers and he watched as the thread danced around each finger, curling its way around one before dropping again. Nigel's voice was just an echo at the back of his mind as Mark gazed at Rob's face, studying each and every curve and the way his skin hugged his chiselled jaw perfectly, and how his pale eyes darted around the room as his mouth released a small huff. Rob's hand reached up and ran through his hair a few times, making the once neat style look quite messy.

Mark's mind wondered for a brief moment to when Rob and he had first laid eyes on each other, he remembered the warmth of the boy's hand and the slight buzz of electricity that he attempted to hide as it ran from his hand all the way through his nervous body. The sound of Rob's voice echoed in his head, and he recalled Rob introducing himself as 'Rob' instead of 'Robert' which he had used with Jason and Howard. Did he think Mark was smaller than him so a childish name would be more suitable? Maybe he felt more comfortable around him and opted for a nickname instead? Definitely not the latter. They had only just met, there could be no way that Rob was that comfortable around him, even it was just regarding his name.

A pencil flew through the air landing near Mark's foot, snapping him out of his thoughts. He was met with the sight of Robbie crawling on the floor in an attempt the retrieve the small object, much to the displeasure of Nigel, who has stopped talking abruptly and was just eyeing Rob, the look on his face wasn't one Mark wanted to see again.

"When Mr Williams has decided to sit still instead of attempting to impersonate a dog looking for a ball, then maybe we shall continue..." said Nigel, his fingers tapped a fast rhythm on his desk as he leaned back and his eyes locked with Gary's who shared an equally annoyed look on his face.

"Yes!" Rob exclaimed as he held the pencil up triumphantly before making his way back to his seat. Mark couldn't help but giggle quietly, glancing at Jason and Howard who seemed to be doing the same.

Nigel continued, stealing glances at a bored looking Rob, his face morphing into displeasure every time he did so. By now Mark guessed the only person really listening was Gary, who was nodding along and smiling at the man's words.

"Okay so now that this meeting is over, I will need you all to sign this contract, it's the same thing that I was talking about before Rob's... unfortunate... pencil episode," Nigel made the same annoyed look as he thought back to the rude interruption, "and you two boys will need a parent or guardian to sign this because neither of you are over 18," Nigel signalled to Rob and Mark with his head.

Rob groaned at that, the prospect of having to be seen in public with his mum already forming in his mind. Mark just blushed slightly at Nigel's comment but said nothing about it.

Nigel then proceeded to usher all five boys towards the dance floor of the club, asking all of them to give a minute presentation of what they were capable of when it comes to moving. They also had to give a small demonstration of their voices. This was the part that Mark was dreading the most, even more so that he would be going last. Perhaps if he went first and got it out of the way they would all forget how terrible he was, but he couldn't be so lucky if he went last.

Jason was up first, blowing the four of them away with his moves. Gary was watching in confusion mostly, being the least skilled in dancing as so had no idea how Jason was able to spin around on his shoulders or his head, or even twist his body the way he did. It didn't seem natural yet he made it seem so fluid and slick.

Howard was also just as impressive as Jason, able to perform the same moves, but it was clear to everyone that Jason had the slight edge when it came to talent. Although dancing certainly wasn't his strong point Gary had an amazing voice, his vocal range wide and his tone powerful.

When it came to Rob, although he was an all-around type Mark couldn't seem to drag his eyes away from watching him. He couldn't ignore the flutter in his tummy when he saw Rob's t-shirt ride up when he was dancing and exposed his stomach, and he certainly couldn't shake the chills he had run down his spine when he started singing.

If Mark didn't blow his chances, he would most definitely have a difficult time performing alongside Rob. There was just something about him that removed Mark from reality, that singled out the two of them from the rest of the world. It was as if he was suspended in time watching him, although his reality didn't quite match up with everyone else's in the room: time was still flowing after all.

"Alright, thank you, Rob." Nigel signalled for him to move to back towards the group. "Seems your talent does actually make up for your childishness."

"Thank you," Rob spoke proudly, a smug smile on his face. "That just leaves you then, Markie." Mark blushed at the nickname that he gave him, embarrassed lightly as the only person who ever called him 'Markie' was his sister, Tracey, when she teased him or his mum when he was much younger.

"Um... yeah. One moment..." Mark was feeling too nervous to move, his legs feeling like jelly. He took a moment to take off his jacket to try and prepare himself, but his pounding heart wasn't helping his mind to think of anything else other than he was going to mess up.

"You're a quiet one, aren't you?" Gary commented. "You nervous or something?"

"No, no - well, yeah, um, a little." He rambled, feeling a pat on his back as he did: Rob.

"Come off it, Markie, you'll be fine! Bet you're proper sick at singing... and can't be worse than Gary's running man!" Rob taunted, Mark giving a small chuckle until he noticed Gary's offended look.

"Um, sorry, Gary! I'm not laughing at you or anything, I'm just a bit nervous and it's the pressure! You were really good, honest! Your voice is amazing!" Mark was completely red in the face by this point.

"Can we please hurry this up?!" Nigel huffed, becoming irritated by all the faffing around.

"Sorry, Nigel." Mark hurried over to the centre of the room with his head ducked low.

"That's 'Sir' to you!" He sneered, Mark just nodding and taking a deep breath. Nigel certainly didn't help to soothe any nerves, that was for sure. He was quite the intimidating man, his steely stare burning into each and every one of the boys and pulling them all into line; it was like he was some sort of sergeant. Mark just had to wonder what the hell he had gotten himself into? Would being in a boy band even be worth it?

As the generic dance music started up Mark looked up across the group, one by one they all gave him their support and comforting smiles (all but Nigel that was, who stood there with his arms folded and his face void of any emotion but annoyance). He made his way along the line to Rob, his heart beating out his chest so hard he swore he saw his t-shirt moving in time with the pounds.

Just what was it about him that drove Mark so crazy? His smile? His floppy hair? Maybe he was just tall, Mark thought with a laugh. Whatever it was, it was the thought of Rob's being that spurred Mark's body into motion.

He danced to the best of his ability, which when he compared it to Jason and Howard he didn't see it as nearly worthy enough. His singing didn't overly impress Nigel either, but he said he wasn't 'too terrible' and that 'with the work of a vocal coach he would be well away'. That was enough in Mark's eyes as he had actually managed to get through the audition, he'd actually managed to get into the boyband!

Later on, the group congregated into the local cafe, Nigel wanting to buy them all lunch as a thank you for coming all the way out to meet him and to thank them for performing in front of each other. Mark sat beside Rob in the booth, pressed up against the wall and Rob's thigh. Howard sat opposite Mark and Jason sat opposite Rob, Gary and Nigel sat at the end of the table and were in a heated discussion about what they should do for their first single.

It was clear to them that Gary would be the main voice in the band, and would do most of the songwriting. Rob seemed a bit put out by that but didn't want to voice it in front of everyone, especially Nigel. He was quickly learning that his cocky attitude wasn't going to get him anywhere, Nigel's personality was just too strong for that... even so, he did enjoy teasing him and was having a competition with himself to see how long he could get away with being irritating towards him.

That night, Mark lay in his bed, the time way past midnight, and yet he couldn't sleep. Thoughts were being busily mulled in his head over and over again. He thought back to the previous day and how it now seemed much more exciting than any of his holidays and parties. He remembered how Rob had been making up various nicknames while they trudged their way back home and how he dared to call him Robbie. The name sounded much nicer and friendly to Mark, not that he had anything against the name Rob or Robert, it just felt more comforting to call him Robbie. And with that Mark finally drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

♪♪♪

A few years passed and by now Take That was flying high at the top of the charts. Their egos had been boosted to the max and it seemed like nothing could stop them now.

Howard and Jason had become inseparable now and Robbie swore he once saw them go into a cupboard together, but no more was said about that. Robbie and Mark were extremely close, although the fact that Mark seemed to share the same friendship with Gary saddened Robbie a little. It wasn't jealously... well yeah maybe it was a bit... nevertheless, his cheekiness had grown along with his confidence and Robbie seemed to always be cracking jokes (or his head).

One summer morning, the five lads were pushing their way through an enormous crowd. Mark covered his head with his arms but that made no difference, he felt himself being tugged in every direction possible, and maybe a few that weren't. He kept his gaze down, his eyes following Robbie's feet which were moving at a slow pace in front of him. Out of nowhere, he felt a leg collide with his shins and his whole body plummeted forwards, the crash slightly softened by his hands. Girls piled on top of him and Mark groaned in pain as his t-shirt was ripped by hundreds of eager hands. Feet clashed against his back, a few cracks echoing.

"GET OFF HIM!" the unmistakable voice of Robbie boomed ever the high pitched screams. Strong arms were wrapped around Mark's vulnerable body and he was dragged inside the glass building.

Mark was carefully laid on the small sofa opposite the reception area while his four worried friends circled him.

"Mark? are you ok?" Gary was first to ask, watching on in worry as Mark winced a the pain in his leg.

"I'll be fine, just give me a moment," Mark replied, clearly lying but didn't want everyone fussing over him.

"It don't look it mate..." said Howard worriedly.

"Look just give me a min-" Mark began insisting, before getting cut off by Robbie.

"Jay, go get a nurse," he muttered.

Instantly Mark began trying to convince everyone he was fine, obviously failing.

A few minutes later, Jason returned, accompanied by a nurse. The woman fussed over him for god knows how long, making Mark growing impatient. After what seemed like an age, he suddenly bolted upright and began walking away, insisting he was fine. He pushed past a door, followed by the other boys. They walked down a long corridor, eyeing each other every time Mark winced in pain. Once they entered a huge room, they were met with the sight of an irritated Nigel.

"You took your time ay?" he bellowed across the room, "You're 45 minutes late, I don't want a pathetic excuse, just the one who caused the delay,"

For a moment silence echoed dangerously, filling the room with tension. Slowly, a shaking Mark stepped forward from behind Robbie.

"I...I did, sir..." he stuttered.

At first, Nigel looked a bit disappointed, probably wanting an excuse to shout at Robbie, while the band just stared at Mark, shocked.

"Well you better come into my office then Mark," Nigel hissed, slowly moving from the other side of the room towards the boys. He stopped when he was a few metres away. Mark stood petrified, unable to move.

"Come on then boy!" spat Nigel.

Still, Mark remained glued to the floor, visibly shaking. The boys behind him grew worried now, however all equally scared to stand up to their manager. Huffing, Nigel lunged forward to grab the small boy, but he stopped in his tracks when he saw the figure of Robbie stand protectively in front of a cowering Mark.

"Get off him Nigel, he's done nothing wrong," Robbie shouted at the shocked man's face.

"Move out of the way," Nigel tried to remain calm.

"No, it's not his fault if he gets hurt," Robbie looked over at Mark, who now hung his head, almost in shame.

"Robbie, it's fine..." Mark whispered, almost inaudibly.

"No, Mark!" Robbie grew more desperate, "shout at me instead."

Nigel attempted to reach around the boy but his access was denied.

"Robert Williams you have 5 seconds to move out of the way or you'll seriously regret it."

Silence. He began counting down 5...4...3...2... Howard realised Robbie wasn't going to move, with a split second decision, he grabbed his friend's wrist and pulled him out of the way just as Nigel said 1, exposing a terrified Mark.

Robbie struggled against Howard's hold, prompting Gary and Jason to help hold him back.

Nigel now placed a strong hand around Mark's arm, keeping eye contact with him. Suddenly, the man yanked at his arm, nearly making the small boy stumble to the ground. Nigel pulled a scared Mark across the room, pushing him into a small office, following him inside and locking the door.

Gary, Jason and Howard let a hysterical Robbie go, who ran to the door, unsuccessfully trying to open it. He sank to the floor next to the door. The other three sat next to him, leaning against the wall.

"Why?" Robbie simply asked.

"Rob... you would have both been shouted at if you continued to act like that,"

"Yeah but-" began Robbie.

"He's right." Gary interrupted.

Robbie huffed and hit his head back onto the wall. They sat in silence, wincing when Nigel's shouting would get especially loud and straining their ears whenever Mark spoke a reply, After about 5 minutes of repetitive shouting, the restless boys heard a noise that sounded like a skin on skin slap, immediately followed by a thud. Shocked, Jason, Gary, Howard and especially Robbie bolted onto their feet, wanting to know what had happened on the other side of the wall. Moments later, Mark emerged, he looked a right state. His eyes were holding back tears, his right hand clutched his left wrist and his cheek was an angry shade of red. He avoided eye contact with his friends, who stood with their mouths agape. Mark moved to step away, but he was stopped by a warm hand around his wrist, shrugged it off and continued to walk, only to be stopped again, this time he couldn't get away from the grip.

"Mark, stop," a familiar voice spoke from behind him. By now his tears hung helplessly waiting to fall, using all his remaining strength, he managed to keep them at bay.

"Mark..." this time the voice was sterner, nevertheless Mark continued ignoring it, still trying to break free, becoming more desperate with each tug. The hand suddenly yanked him back and he spun around, his arms recoiling to his chest instinctively and he felt himself sink into a warm embrace. He tensed at first, but he relaxed at once when he recognised Robbie's strong arms rubbing his back soothingly. The loving actions opened the floodgates and he let out a sob, followed by tears. Mark buried his head in Robbie's chest craving for comfort. His sobs ceased a bit when Robbie rested his chin on Mark's head, removing a hand from his back to gently stroke his hair. Sobs became sniffs and after a few minutes, Mark had calmed down and was resting in Robbie's warm arms.

When the taller boy was happy that his friend was fine, he pulled away, still keeping a firm hold on Mark by putting his hands on his shoulders. He looked deep into his eyes, Mark broke the eye contact immediately hanging his head down to supposedly look at the floor. Robbie took a hand from his shoulder, placing it under Mark's chin and tilted his face up. This time Mark just stood there, he felt his heartbeat quicken when he realised just how close their faces were. Before he could say anything, he felt his face turn to the left as Robbie examined the red bruising on his cheek.

"I'm fine Rob," Mark whimpered as Robbie grazed a finger over it.

"This needs some ice," the taller boy spoke, ignoring the shorter one.

"Honestly, stop fussing over me!" Mark just wanted to get on with the day and not cause any more delays, he couldn't bare another encounter like that with Nigel. He'd always been afraid of him, but that was the first time any of his lectures had become physical. Mark blamed himself, even if he knew he shouldn't. After all, he was the one who kept interrupting him, the one who foolishly tried to defend himself against a tyrant who would take no excuses.

"I can't believe he just did that," Jason whispered so that Nigel wouldn't hear them through the wall. "Are you sure you're okay? Does it hurt?" He fussed over him, Robbie getting a little protective over Mark now and holding him a bit closer; he felt like he should be the one to comfort Mark, a strange feeling willing him to be like a guardian angel over him. He didn't want anyone else to be the one who he could call a shoulder to cry on.

"Let's just get to rehearsing... we're already late because of me." Mark didn't give Jason (or any of the boys) an answer to the question and instead moved from Robbie's grip, limping his way down the corridor to the rehearsal space.

Robbie was the first to follow him, catching up to him quickly and holding his hand to show his support, Mark just keeping his eyes locked to the floor. He was too ashamed to face him, even though they had all already seen that he was crying. He felt like if he didn't face him he wouldn't have to face up to his situation.

"Are you going to be okay to be prancing around a dance studio all afternoon? You're still limping pretty badly." He asked him, Mark just shrugging at his question, Robbie sighing and standing in front of him so that he couldn't move anywhere. "I don't care about that bastard. If you need a break at any point you just say, okay? If he wants to have another row with you then I'll happily sort him out for you-"

"No, Robbie... I don't want you to get in trouble for me." Mark insisted, looking up to him now. "You're always the one who gets in trouble with him. The way you stood up for me back there... I really did appreciate it, Robbie, honest I did! But I really wished you wouldn't do that. I don't want to see Nigel get as mad with you as he did with me back there."

"I know it's obvious Mark, but please just clear up what happened in that office. Did he actually hit you?" Mark looked down again, nodding subtly as though he didn't want to admit it. Robbie grew even more enraged now, as if hearing confirmation of what actually happened had lifted the fog from his eyes and he could see only anger directed at Nigel.

"I had it coming." Mark's voice was timid, barely above a whisper. He noticed Robbie glaring in the direction of the office door now, Mark holding his hand to take his attention away. "Promise me you won't say anything."

"How can I not say anything to him!? This is so wrong, Mark! He's our boss, manager, whatever... that doesn't mean he can hurt you like that! You of all people!" Mark agreed with that, but didn't know why Robbie singled him out like that. Even still, he couldn't deny the way Robbie was willing to risk his job for him like that was giving him butterflies in his stomach. He'd never known anyone to be so protective and caring over him so he put the butterflies down to that... but he couldn't help but wonder if there was more to it... after all, he seemed to be having this feeling more often than not when he was around Robbie.

"I don't want to see you get hurt or in trouble, or even get kicked out the band! I don't know how I'd cope here without you! Please, just behave around Nigel for a bit, just until this whole thing has blown over!" He begged, Robbie looking like he was considering it, but wanted to stay mad at Nigel. "For me?" Those were the words that managed to convince him.

"Alright, Markie... for you." He placed his hand on Mark's still-red cheek and sighed. "But if he touches you again I'm not going to stand for it... I'll try and keep some restraint in the meantime though."

"Thanks, Robbie. I really appreciate it." Mark stepped up onto his tiptoes (with a bit of difficulty due to the pain in his leg) and kissed Robbie's cheek, pulling away to find the taller boy was bright red in the face and looking slightly flustered.

"Um... no problem." He sounded rather vacant. "Er, right! Rehearsals, yes! Let's... let's go do that now!" He took Mark's hand and pulled him gently along towards the dance studio, neither one of them saying anything as they made their way through the building. They were both far too distracted by the fluttering feeling in their stomachs, both aware that the feeling they kept experiencing was only when they were around each other... yet neither of them quite understood what that meant.

They entered the room still clutching each other's hand tightly. The first to notice them was Gary, he looked at them suspiciously, moving his gaze from their hands to their faces. Mark noticed this and instinctively went to pull his hand away, only to find it back in Robbie's as soon as it had left. Slightly confused he looked up at his friend, searching for an answer. The taller boy just smiled down at him, apparently oblivious to Mark's confusion.

"Heya, guys!" Howard called them over from the centre of the room, Jason stopping his spinning once he saw the other three coming over.

Howard looked at Robbie and Mark's entwined hands and turned his head to look at Jason, who did the same.

"Wait a minute...how'd you guys get here before us?" Robbie asked.

"Went past you two when you were busy making googly eyes at each other," Jason answered smugly.

"We're just friends..." Mark trailed off, almost as if he was doubting himself.

"Don't worry, I mean friends do that all the time, right How?" Jason looked over at his friend.

Howard lustfully licked his lips, not breaking eye contact with Jason, winking cheekily afterwards.

As the band laughed merrily, they heard the door bang loudly, interrupting them abruptly. The figure of Kieran moved towards them.

"So Nigel tells me you were very late today," Mark turned scarlet at this comment, calming a little when he felt Robbie gently squeeze his hand, "and now apparently, as a 'punishment', you have a whole day of dance rehearsals instead," Kieran continued. Gary's mouth dropped open at the prospect of having to dance for the whole day. Jason and Howard however, grew excited, mostly by the fact that they wouldn't have to sing.

Kieran pointed a bony finger towards a young boy near a huge speaker, he pressed a button and music began blasting from it. Reluctantly the group of boys positioned themselves to start rehearsing. Mark's hand felt strangely cold, now that it wasn't tightly pressed to Robbie's, he did his best to ignore his thoughts and just get on with the dancing. Unluckily for him, it was easier said than done. He found his body kept gravitating towards the younger boy, and each time he would stumble due to the instability in his leg at the moment he would always fall in Robbie's direction

After about one hour of practising the same routine over and over again, they had a quick break, filling their bodies with as much water as possible. Suddenly, the door swung open and Nigel stepped inside, everyone went quiet. Mark looked down at his feet, the last thing he wanted was to make eye contact with him. After glancing at the boys for a moment, Nigel moved to go and talk to Kieran, just as the group moved back into formation to practice again.

Left, Right, Left, Right, Up, Up, Arm out and spin. Mark thought, he found it hard to concentrate on the movements he needed to do, somehow knowing Nigel was in the room, probably watching them, made him nervous. He nearly stumbled over his feet as the chorus repeated itself Left, Right, Left, Right, Up, Up, Arm out and spin. He dared to look up, immediately regretting it as he saw Nigel's intimidating face eyeing him as he tried his best to keep going without messing up. Wanting a distraction, he glanced to his right and saw Robbie dancing, his shirt gliding upwards, exposing his belly, as he jumped during the short instrumental, making Mark's breath catch in his throat. Left, Right, Left, Right, Up, Up, Arm out and spin. Wait. Or was it Right, Left, Right, Left, Down, Up, Spin, Spin? He panicked for a moment, not remembering the next part of the song he tripped over his own feet and crashed onto the floor, hitting his palms on the ground first which sent a painful crack echoing across the room.

Immediately, everyone stopped dancing and Gary bent down to try and help Mark up onto his feet. Red with embarrassment, Mark hastily refused help and got himself up, while doing so he couldn't help but sneak a look at Nigel who was smirking, almost like he was satisfied by what his presence had caused. Looking down at his burning hands, Mark shook them in an attempt to cool them down. Gary took one of the red hands and examined it carefully, ignoring the 'I'm fine' Mark had muttered as he began doing so. Robbie felt a small urge to grab Mark's hand from Gary's grasp and tend to it himself, however hard it was, he managed to contain himself, giving Gary a devil stare instead, which went unnoticed by everyone.

"Oh come on Mark, it can't be that bad," Nigel piped up from his seat. The small boy went scarlet again and pulled his hand from Gary's and murmured something inaudible. Robbie felt rage bubbling under his skin, he remembered Mark begging for him not to have a go at Nigel and he closed his eyes to try to calm himself down. For him, he kept reminding himself, do it for him.

"For god's sake guys, just act like men and start practising again," he walked over to them and stood there, a menacing look plastered on his face.

"Let me see what's so bad with your hands you can't even dance," with that, he grabbed Mark's wrist to take a closer look at his now slightly bleeding hands, Mark having to surpass a small whimper but wasn't very successful. Robbie lunged forward, standing between them, forcing their hands apart.

"Don't you fucking touch him!" Robbie growled.

"Rob..." Mark whispered from behind him, "I'm fine it's only a bit of a sting,"

"Don't take that tone with me, Robert, you don't want to end up like your little friend do you?" Nigel teased, a mischievous grin crawling onto his face.

Mark sensed Robbie's anger radiating from his skin, he was terrified a fight would break out there and then. "Just leave it." He warned, Robbie glancing back and looking to Mark's puppy-dog eyes. He could never say no to him when he gave him that look. "Let's just get back to rehearsing... please? I promise I'll be better Nigel. I'm sorry for giving so many delays and messing up and - and just not being good enough... I'll be better." He couldn't look up at his manager as he spoke to him, instead keeping his glassy, tear-filled vision to the floor.

He bit his lip when Nigel just gave a low hum in response, deciding to drop it for now. He told them all to get back to their positions, to take it from the top. "Any more issues like this, and there will be dire consequences, I don't care who messes up." He warned them all, Mark taking a deep breath to settle himself before the beat kicked back in.

For the most part, Mark managed to keep himself in full concentration, although he was keeping his head down so that no one would be able to see the silent tears that streaked their way down his cheeks. No one but Robbie that was.

Robbie kept his eye on him for the entire rehearsal, not caring when Nigel (who stayed in the room to watch over them like a hawk stalking its next victim) told him his movements were too sloppy or he wasn't quite getting things right. Robbie couldn't care less if Nigel would punish him for it: he cared only for Mark. If Nigel even touched Mark again he wasn't so sure if he would be able to contain himself.

Once the hellish session was finally over they all made their way to the small shower space, Robbie intending to talk with Mark and ask him if he was doing okay, to check up on any injuries and make sure he would nurse them properly now that he didn't need to stay on his feet as much. There was just one problem: Gary had got there first.

He made a beeline for Mark the second rehearsals had ended and hadn't given Robbie the chance to get close since then. He stayed one step behind them as they made their way out of the building, glaring into the back of Gary's skull the entire time. At one point he thought his thought track would start sending signals to Gary through telepathy and he'd be able to tell him to leave Mark alone, that he was Robbie's... wait, he wasn't Robbie's anything. He was just a friend; nothing more.

"Oi," Jason whispered to Robbie, pulling him back from the others. "Sending evil looks at him isn't going to do much, you know. He's very obviously not picking up on your very obvious jealousy."

"Jealousy?! I'm not jealous! Where did you get that idea from?" He tried to defend himself, keeping his voice down so that Gary and especially Mark wouldn't hear the conversation.

"I know how close you are with Mark, we all do... but he's Gary's friend too. Let him have a bit of time with him for now." He didn't want any arguments to break out within the band, not over Mark. "Why don't you ask him to stay in your room tonight? Just say you want to make sure he's definitely okay. If he says no then just let it go, don't seem clingy."

"You giving me relationship advice?" Robbie scoffed. "I don't think I've ever seen you with a girl ever! What do you know about liking someone - not that I do like him... well, I don't not like him... it's complicated. I'm not really sure."

"Just because you don't see me hanging out with every girl I see doesn't mean I'm not interested, or even that I'm not in a relationship." Robbie quirked his eyebrow at that. "You just need to practice on how to be more subtle... we've gotten away with it for ages now." Jason was being rather vague on it which irritated Robbie; he couldn't tell if he was winding him up or was actually telling the truth. He must have been pulling his leg, after all the only person Jason had ever been properly close with was Howard and there was no way they were together... right?

"Well, alright." Robbie huffed, trying not to think about Jason's hinting. "But this doesn't mean I like him! Do not tell anyone, I mean it!" He warned Jason, who swore to it.

Once they all climbed into the van that would take them to the hotel Robbie took the opportunity to sit next to Mark, the older boy smiling to him as he clicked on his seat-belt.

"How's your hands now?" Robbie gently took them in his, turning his hands over to look at the damage. "It still looks sore."

"They're fine." Mark didn't make much of an effort to move his hands away from him.

"That's good... and your leg? You were still limping a bit on the way here." He questioned, Mark just shrugging.

"Now I'm sitting down it's feeling a bit better. I think I just need to rest it." That told Robbie that he was still in quite a bit of pain with it. "I'll be alright though, thanks for asking."

"Just looking out for my little buddy." Robbie smiled, gently pressing a kiss to Mark's knuckles. He took the opportunity to distract himself from his blushing now, deciding to take Jason's advice. "Um, this sounds kinda weird to ask, but would you be alright with me staying in your room tonight?"

"Sure, I'd actually appreciate that after the awful day I've had." Mark sounded grateful, Robbie pleased to hear that. "And it's not weird at all... it's not like we don't share rooms pretty much most nights anyway." He had a point there. Robbie had always just happened to fall asleep in Mark's bed or vice versa; it just felt strange to be asking permission to stay the night.

"That's true." He laughed nervously, looking out the van window once it had started to move. He noticed in the reflection that Gary was staring over at them, trying to look subtle while he thought no one was watching him. Robbie noticed now that Gary was, in fact, looking at his and Mark's intertwined hands, Robbie slyly making the effort to adjust how he was holding them, rubbing his thumb over the back of Mark's hand as he did.

He thought back to Jason calling him out on being jealous of Gary and Mark, but it seemed he wasn't the only one who felt jealousy... although he had to admit Gary was far more subtle about it than Robbie could ever hope to be.

The van pulled up at the hotel after what felt like an eternity, Robbie keeping his hand in Mark's as they made their way up to the room. Jason patted Robbie's back as he walked past them to his room, being closely followed by Howard. He smiled at Jason, giving a subtle way to thank him for giving him the opportunity to spend the night with Mark, to help him figure out just what he was feeling towards him.

As soon as they entered, Mark fell onto the bed, exhausted. He struggled a bit, kicking his shoes off and throwing his jacket across the room, watching it land in a heap onto the small sofa. He just left with his very oversized jumper, tight fitting black jeans and white socks. Tired, he rubbed his hands across his face a few times before running them through his hair, closing his eyes and letting out a long sigh.

Robbie watched, almost in a trance, he just couldn't tear his eyes away from his friend. He figured that he must look pretty weird watching Mark like that, the truth was he just couldn't help it. Trying his best to keep his eyes to himself, he took off his shoes and jumper which he placed next to Mark's jacket. He slowly walked over to the bed, he sat on the bed next to Mark, and carefully lay down so he wasn't too close or too far away from him.

With tired eyes, Mark looked at Robbie and smiled, he shuffled over so that Robbie's arm was underneath his neck.

"Tired?" Was all Robbie managed to say, while trying not to focus on the warmth he felt from Mark's body.

"Yeah," Mark sighed.

They stayed like that for a few minutes, pondering over the events of the day. Robbie thought over what Jason had told him, his mind fighting a battle over whether to tell Mark about his feelings. He wanted to, so badly, but most of all he wanted Mark to return his feelings, he didn't want to risk disappointment because he knew that would just make it awkward. Oh stuff it Robbie thought, Mark would understand and nothing would get ruined... hopefully.

Mark got up from the bed muttering a quick 'need the loo' before walking to the ensuite and locking himself inside. Robbie found himself staring at the door, hoping for Mark to get back soon so he could confess. To his disappointment, he heard the water begin to flow from the shower. Patiently waiting, he closed his eyes in an attempt to relax.

About ten minutes later, Mark emerged from the bathroom, a small towel sitting on his hips. Robbie watched his friend retrieve his clothes from his suitcase. He couldn't help but watch a water droplet as it fell from his hair, it trickled down his toned chest and skimmed the small dolphin tattoo before dissolving into the towel. As Mark slipped on some boxers and a big t-shirt, Robbie stripped down to his boxers, throwing his clothes across the room so they landed next on the sofa. He looked over at Mark one last time before he nervously cleared his throat.

"Markie?" He asked as the small boy climbed onto the bed and lay down next to him.

"Yeah?" Mark replied, looking slightly worried. He could tell Robbie was leading up to talk about something serious, but that usually wasn't something Robbie did. It must be pretty important.

"I need to talk to you about something..." Robbie began, he felt his tongue swell up in his mouth and for a second he panicked when he felt himself nearly choke with worry.

"Is everything alright Rob?" Mark sat up now, looking at Robbie in the eyes. The taller boy felt a heart skip a beat when he saw the colours of Mark's eyes swirl elegantly into one another creating an endless paradise.

"Y-yeah, I just needed to... um... I need to... erm ..." Robbie paused for a second debating whether to continue or not, "Nevermind," the boy hung his head down, breaking the eye contact.

"Robbie? Whatever it is you can tell me. I won't judge," Mark spoke softly, "Has something happened? Is it personal? In your family? Is that it? I can try and help"

"No, it's not that..."

"It's not Nigel, is it? I told you not to say anyth-"

"No, I wish it was though..." Robbie sighed at that, Mark tilting his head slightly in confusion. If only he knew how adorable he looked at that particular moment, Robbie thought to himself... If only Robbie could tell him how adorable he looked.

"Then tell me, what's going on?" Mark was persistent.

"Mark, don't worry, it's nothing, it will probably go away, I hope." That last, barely whispered comment worried Mark even more.

"Are you sure?" He asked for an answer one last time.

"Yeah, it's fine," It really wasn't fine.

Still looking unsure, Mark decided to drop it and opted for snuggling against Robbie instead. He pulled the duvet from underneath both of them and draped it over himself before laying down on his belly, half on, half off Robbie.

"You don't mind do you?" Mark asked, secretly hoping he would say no.

Doing his best to calm himself down Robbie shakily replied, "No, it's fine."

"Good," and with that, Mark began drifting off. The younger boy lay there for a few minutes, trying his best not to make things weird by wrapping his arms around him and spoon him in his sleep. He instead opted for staring up at the blank ceiling, his mind going over the events of the day. He was so close to telling Mark just how he felt, his regret managing to eat at him more than he would like; he just wished he wasn't such a coward.

He thought over how he stood up for Mark multiple times today, back when Nigel was having a rant at him, and when he got trampled before that. He felt so sorry for him today, but nothing quite like the sorrow he felt when he heard that slap coming through the wall of Nigel's office. The sorrow was an odd feeling, as he knew his first reaction to it should have been the rage and anger he felt when Mark told him what had happened, but it wasn't. He felt heartbroken that anyone could actually hurt Mark, confused by it. To him, Mark was the sweetest, kindest and all around the most perfect guy you could ever know... why would anyone want to do him wrong?

Yet for some reason, wrongs just kept happening to him today, and he continued to get hurt. Robbie swore an oath as he finally began to drift off to sleep: he swore that he would make the next day one million per cent better for him, that he would let no harm come to him no matter what the consequences. No matter what Nigel would threaten them with.

♪♪♪

Mark awoke peacefully the next morning, he felt Robbie's bare chest against his cheek and he found his arm draped over his friend's abdomen. He smiled to himself when he saw Robbie gently stirring, Mark could just lay here for ages, watching Robbie sleep, his chest rising slightly and falling gently, over and over again. However, one look at the bedside clock told him that they needed to get up and fast if they were to avoid another lecture from Nigel.

"Rob?" Mark murmured, trying to wake him up as gently as possible. Nothing happened.

"Robbieee," Mark continued, shaking him slightly. Robbie stirred, he opened his eyes for a moment, closing them again when he saw light filling the room.

"Go back to sleep Markie..." he groaned sleepily.

"We've got 20 minutes to be out of this hotel," Mark replied.

"Ugh, I don't wanna get up." Robbie ran his hands across his face, in an attempt to wake himself.

An idea suddenly popped into Mark's mind, yes it was slightly mischievous but it was probably the only way to get Robbie out of bed. Slowly, he began moving his hands down towards Robbie's sides. Taking his friend by surprise, Mark began tickling him. Robbie's eyes snapped open and he failed to suppress laughter as the feeling rippled through his body. The smaller boy began moving his hands up and down the taller's body, dodging Robbie's arms as he did so.

"Stop, please, Mark!" Robbie howled with laughter.

"I don't think so mate," Mark teased.

"Oh, you are gonna regret this..." Robbie flipped them over so now he was on top, tickling Mark, making him nearly scream with laughter.

"I'm gonna pee meself, Rob!"

Robbie decided to put Mark out of his misery and stopped his 'torture'. Mark sighed happily and looked up at Robbie, only just then realising how close they were, their faces were just centimetres apart. Slowly his smile began to fade and Mark looked deep into his friend's eyes and how light they actually looked in contrast to his quite dark hair colour. He took a moment and looked at his lips before looking back into his eyes. Robbie swallowed and began to lean in, just by a few millimetres, to see if anything would happen. Nothing. He leaned in just a bit more, now he could feel Mark's warm breath against his lips and that kickstarted his heart into an unsteady and nervous beat. He decided to risk it and lean in just a bit more. His head slowly moved forwards 'This is it' Robbie thought and just as their lips were about to touch, a knock echoed from the door making Robbie abruptly stop. Staring into Mark's eyes for a second, he was only expressing confusion. He pulled back and sat on the bed for a moment before standing up and going to open the door.

Slightly annoyed, Robbie pulled the door open and saw a Gary stood there, who's smile faded when he saw Robbie instead of Mark.

"Yeah?" Robbie irritably asked.

"Oh, I came to just ask how Mark was doing... but erm... obviously fine... yeah," Gary replied, stuttering slightly.

"He's fine." Robbie hoped that the encounter would end here.

"Yeah thanks... erm I better just go then, alright" Gary nervously said, he turned around and walked off, not waiting for a response.

Sighing quietly, Robbie looked over his shoulder and saw Mark sat on the bed, face in hands and hair sticking up everywhere.

"Just gonna pop to my room and get some clothes a'right?" He dared to speak.

Not removing his hands, Mark nodded, Robbie nodding back, not sure what to do.

He walked through the door, silently shutting it behind him. Robbie tiptoed his way along the corridor, trying not to draw attention to himself, which wasn't easy since he was only wearing a pair of black boxers. Jason emerged from a room, nearly bumping into his as he did so.

"Heya Rob! So how was the night at Mark's?" he asked, enthusiastic to know what had happened the night before.

"Good. Fine. I don't really know." Robbie pondered slightly, remembering the night before, "Nearly told Mark 'bout everything, other than that not much to be honest."

Jason took one good look at Robbie's face and guessed that there was more to that story.

"What about you then eh?" Robbie tried to change the subject.

"Just coming back from Howard's room and going to my room to get some clothes for today. Anyway, that's not important right now. What happened with Mark? Something's definitely bothering you." Jason crossed his arms.

"Erm... ok fine I'll tell you. Right, so...erm... I've literally just come back from it and um..." Robbie trailed off, not sure if to leave it there or continue.

"Yeah, and..." Jason edged him on.

"We nearly kissed." Robbie finished, looking at his hands.

Thinking for a moment, Jason replied, "Nearly?"

"Yeah, bloody Gary Barlow came knocking asking to see if Mark's okay," rolling his eyes, Robbie remembered his heart sink as the special moment was ruined.

"Ah, I see."

Neither spoke, they just stood there, awkwardly.

"Don't take it out on Gary though, just remember he has no idea what he interrupted, I mean unless you plan on telling him or something, I don't know," Jason leaned against the wall, "Anyways I better get dressed, you too." And with that, he walked off.

Robbie thought about that for a moment: 'unless you plan on telling him'. That would definitely give him an excuse to spend more time with Mark than Gary could. Perhaps that was the best way forward? He also considered that Gary might not keep his secret and tell Mark everything, Robbie would resent that even more than him interrupting him or just being ever present whenever he and Mark had the opportunity to be close.

"You just going to stand there in your pants all day, Williams?" The voice of his manager cut through his thought process. "Get dressed. I told you I wasn't going to stand for any tardiness today, so you better hurry up!" Robbie nodded, a little embarrassed to be caught out by Nigel in nothing but his boxers.

He got himself dressed in record time and packed all his things, placing them on the luggage cart before making his way over to Mark's room again. He moved his hand to knock on the door but a voice spoke up before he could.

"He's already in the lobby." It was Gary. "How come you spent the night with him? He's not a little kid, in spite of his size... he can look after himself, you know." Robbie was seriously starting to loathe Gary at the moment.

"I stayed because he'd had, quite frankly, one of the worst days of his life!" He snapped at him, Gary was taken aback by it. "I wanted him to know that I'm always going to be there for him, no matter what! Even if I keep having disruptions from the likes of you!"

"What does it matter? I was just checking up on him!" Gary bit back. Robbie sighed now, thinking of Jason's words of wisdom. He had told him not to take it out on Gary, he still didn't know the whole story after all.

As much as it killed Robbie inside to say it, he eventually uttered the words: "I know... sorry. I just... well, you see there's a bit more to it than you think." He hadn't said anything about him liking Mark as more than a friend yet but his heart was already pounding. "I needed to tell you about this actually. It's... yeah, it's really important."

His words had caught Gary's interest. "We're late, tell me on the way to the lobby." He walked beside Robbie, the two of them heading to the lift.

"I've been a bit of an arse to you recently, I don't know if you've noticed or not." He started, Gary scoffing.

"You've always been a bit of an arse to me, Rob... what's the difference?" He asked, Robbie biting his lip as he tried to think of how to word his confession.

"Can I ask you one thing?" Gary nodded. "Can I ask you to leave me and Mark alone for a little bit... you see, I-"

"I knew it!" Gary cheered. "You like him! I knew it!" Robbie blushed at Gary's words but was also slightly annoyed that the reacted the way he did. Of course, Gary knew. Of course, he did.

"Not so loud!" Even though they weren't on the ground floor yet he still didn't appreciate him singing it from the rooftops. "Someone might hear you!"

"So you're not denying it?" Gary sounded so smug. "How long have you felt this way?"

"I don't know... it's only recently that I've even come to terms with it." He admitted, wishing the lift would just hurry up so he could get out of the conversation as quickly as possible. "But, well... probably from the moment I ever set eyes on him." Just saying out loud made Robbie realise how helplessly in love he was.

"Love at first sight? Wow, Rob, I didn't think you were one of those guys." He wasn't quite sure what Gary meant by that. "But... okay. I'll keep my distance, but on one condition." Robbie waited for his wager. "You do anything to hurt and upset him and I'll never forgive you for it. I'll make sure you won't get anywhere near him again if you ever break his heart, you hear me?"

"Pretty protective over him, aren't you?" Robbie scoffed, even though it was rather hypocritical of him to say that. "Whatever, that doesn't matter to me because I'd never do that. I want to make him the happiest person in the world, I'd never do anything to break his heart."

"Good answer," Gary spoke as the lift doors opened. They both sighted Mark stood on his own in the lobby, avoiding Howard and Jason as they were lost in their own little world and conversations. "I take it you haven't said anything to him yet?" Gary whispered, Robbie appreciating that he would keep his voice down around him.

"I practically nearly kissed him this morning, just before you decided to knock on the door and interrupt us." Robbie was still bitter over that, although figured it may have been a blessing in disguise: Mark's face was full of confusion, that meant to Robbie that he didn't feel the same way. That it was all over for his little love campaign. He would never get to be with him.

"So that's why you were being so grouchy." It all made sense to Gary now. "Was Mark into it?" He asked out of the blue.

"I don't know... he just kinda froze." Robbie regretted to inform him of that. "I can't bear the thought but I don't think he sees me as anything more than a friend."

"You haven't confessed anything yet, you haven't spoken to him about it, right?" Robbie shook his head. "Then you don't know that for sure. Go talk to him." Gary sounded rather reluctant to say that, but also sounded as though he knew more about this than he was letting on.

"Thanks for understanding." Robbie smiled at him before heading over to Mark.

Mark was stood staring down at his feet, too lost in his thought track to notice Robbie greeting him. Slightly worried, Robbie placed his hand on Mark's shoulder, snapping him out of his trance and pulling him back to the real world.

"Sorry, did you say something?" He looked up to him, his cheeks flushed slightly red.

"No, I just got here... is everything okay? You seem a bit spaced out." Mark nodded and looked over to Nigel as he instructed them all to head over to the van.

"I'm fine." Was all Mark said. Robbie was terrified now that Mark had been completely put off by Robbie trying to kiss him, that he didn't want anything more to do with him.

"Hey, um, about this morning-"

"I need to talk to you about something." Mark interrupted him, looking around to all the others around him, to potential media spies that were listening in. "But not here. In private."

"Sure." Robbie was nervous about what he wanted to talk about, hoping it was a positive thing and not something that would leave him in tears and defeated. "We can go find somewhere on our break later on if you want?" He suggested, Mark nodding.

"Yeah, that'd be great." He looked back up to Robbie for a moment, his cheeks turning slightly rosy and he quickly looked away again. "Let's go before Nigel has a go at us."

Their day could not have gone any slower if it tried. As they did a quick morning TV interview Robbie found his concentration was nonexistent. He answered questions in a ditsy matter, unable to find the funny and slightly cocky personality that he usually had in front of the cameras. By the time they had finished Robbie almost felt like he never wanted to do another interview again... but of course, he had another five lined up with various journalists and magazines, all making the hours tick by even slower towards their break.

By the time it did finally roll around he made a beeline for Mark, asking him where they should go, Mark just shrugging and looking around.

"Somewhere private." He told him, Robbie nodding and opting for a public toilet cubical. Mark didn't seem so warm to the idea but could think of no better alternatives. He followed Robbie closely as they followed the city signs for the toilets. They both headed inside and Mark lead him inside the cubical, locking the door behind him.

"What did you want to talk about?" He asked him as Mark turned around.

It all happened so fast. Mark had turned around to him and stood up on his tiptoes; cupping Robbie's head in his hands and pulling it closer to his. The next thing he knew Mark was kissing him and Robbie was kissing back. Their bodies pressed closer to each other as the kiss deepened, Robbie grabbing some of Mark's hair as the kiss grew more passionate. Mark moved his hands from Robbie's head and slowly snaked his arms around his neck instead, Robbie moving his hands to Mark's hips, pulling him just that little bit closer to him.

The moment was incredible, but just as soon as it had started it had stopped. Mark was the one up pulled away, his cheeks a very deep shade of red but there was a smile on his face. "I meant to do that in the hotel room, but I froze up." He admitted. "Sorry..."

"Wow..." Robbie gasped, stunned for the time being as he tried to come to terms with the fact Mark had just kissed him, and with such passion too.

"I've... I've wanted to do that for such a long time. I was always confused about the way I felt, not knowing what this weird feeling in my gut was whenever it was around you, whenever you smiled or just took the time to care about me. " He confessed, still rather breathless from their kiss. "But then this morning after you leaned in... you were so close to me but I just couldn't seem to think straight. I had that feeling again, like butterflies and excitement and pure joy and I didn't know why it was only ever with you... until the opportunity to kiss went away thanks to Gary. I realised just how disappointed I was deep down... that was when everything started to become clear."

"You've no idea how relieved I am to hear those words, Mark... I'm so glad you feel the same way." Robbie pecked him on the lips again, Mark moving to kiss back. Before things got too passionate Mark pulled away again, looking hesitant to say something at first, but then he seemed to have a boost of confidence and he managed to say the words that had been on his tongue since he had first met him.

"I love you, Robbie... I really, really do. I love you so much!" He confessed, Robbie was overcome with joy at the words he was hearing.

"Me too... you I mean, I love you... not myself. I mean, you know, I love myself too but I love you way more-" He started to ramble nervously but Mark shushed him, placing his finger over his lips and speaking in a very low and quiet tone.

"Just shut up and kiss me again."

And so he did, Robbie leaned in once again and his lips captured Mark's. His hands subconsciously wrapped around his waist again, pulling him closer than before. Smiling into the kiss, the shorter boy responded by slightly raising himself more on his tiptoes and resting a hand in his hair. The kiss got more passionate as it continued and almost hungry.

Not too long after, both boys pulled broke the kiss to catch their breath back. Their eyes stared deep into one another's, thoughts chugged through their brain but neither of them spoke.

After a few seconds of silence, Robbie spoke up, "We should probably get back to the lads."

Mark simply nodded and smiled sweetly. He turned around, reluctantly releasing Robbie from his grip, and he opened the cubicle door. He stepped out of the confined space, closely followed by Robbie. Not speaking a word they made their way out of the toilets, hands entwined.

♪♪♪

They arrived at the van where they found the other three boys already inside, but no sign of Nigel. Jason and Howard were once again involved in a conversation, meanwhile, Gary flicked through his music sheets, making adjustments here and there. He looked up and smiled when he saw Robbie and Mark were holding hands. Mark blushed slightly when he saw Gary was watching them but Robbie just smirked, looking pleased with himself. They sat in the seats across the aisle to Gary, Mark next to the window and Robbie nearer to the aisle. After making themselves comfortable the took hold of each other's hands again and smiled at each other.

Suddenly, the door swung open and Nigel stormed inside making the van fall silent. He strode down the aisle, stopping briefly at Jason and Howard before continuing along. He stopped where the three boys sat, looking over to Gary first, the pair locked eyes, neither uttering a word. Slowly, Nigel turned his head and faced the two boys, he looked down and saw how their hands tightly clasped one another, making him frown slightly. Looking back up again, he watched Mark cower, almost hiding behind Robbie.

"Mark, outside. Now." he spat, pointing at the exit before heading out of the bus.

The small boy sat transfixed for a second, glancing a Robbie for a moment before standing up and climbing over his friend. Before he could take another step, the taller boy grabbed his arm.

"Be careful eh?" Robbie warned, looking into Mark's frightened eyes.

Mark just nodded sadly and made his way along the aisle, past Jason and Howard and out of the van.

Robbie sat there, his head poking into the aisle as he waited eagerly for Mark to come back. Turning his head towards Gary, he saw worry plastered across his face. Robbie waited and waited and after 4 long minutes, Mark's small shape wobbled back onto the van, followed by a smug looking Nigel. As the boy walked along, he stared down at his feet and occasionally running a hand over his eye. Robbie instantly knew something was up, he watched as Mark walked towards him, closer and closer. And to Robbie's great surprise, Mark walked straight past him and towards the back of the van. Shocked, he looked over to Gary who seemed to be doing the same thing. They both looked back over to Mark and watched as he lay down across the four seats at the back, his back towards them and his face staring into the cushion of the chair.

Without thinking, Robbie stood up and rushed towards his friend. When he got there, he stopped for a moment and looked at the state of Mark's face. There weren't any cuts or bruises (except the one from yesterday, which Robbie was still furious about) but Mark's eyes looked awful. They were rimmed in a shiny blood-like red and tears stained his cheeks. The once vibrant colour had gone bland and his pupils were dilated.

Mark flinched when he felt a warm hand on his shoulders and he buried his head into the seat, hoping to hide away as much as possible.

"Mark? What happened?" Robbie asked, trying not to sound angry or scared.

No answer.

"Mark?" Robbie grew more desperate now.

Silence

"Mark please tell me what's wrong."

Still no answer.

Robbie realised Mark wasn't going to collaborate to instead he turned around so that he was facing Nigel. His eyes flickered with anger. It all happened too fast for anyone to say exactly what had happened. One moment Robbie was next to Mark, the next he was shoving Nigel and screaming at the top of his lungs.

"What the fuck did you do!?" Screamed Robbie, pushing Nigel with as much force as possible.

"Robbie!" Gary tried to verbally stop him from causing any more damage.

"You fucking bastard! Don't you dare go near Mark!" Robbie insisted, blinded by rage.

Nigel's silence only made Robbie get angrier, he suddenly couldn't contain himself any longer, his fist flew through the air and landed on the side of his manager's face, sending him sprawling on the floor.

An awkward silence followed the gasps, and Robbie instantly regretted throwing that punch, he turned his head first saw Jason and Howard looking dumbstruck, his eyes shifted further and he saw Gary half in the aisle half on his seat. But the sight that made him realise what he had just done was Mark, he was stood in the aisle, next to Gary, his hands covering his mouth and his eyes wild in shock.

Slowly turning back around again, Robbie saw Nigel had stood up and was towering over the now vulnerable boy.

"Well boy, I hope you enjoyed pratting about on your last ever interview. You're fired." Nigel growled, making everyone but Robbie gasp.

"Nigel..." Gary tried to reason.

"No," Robbie simply said, "I don't need this shit in my life, I'm off," and with that, he pushed past Nigel and hopped off the van. He began running, wanting to get as far away as possible.

"Robbie!" Mark called, running down the aisle towards the exit.

By now Robbie was too far away to hear Mark's desperate calls. As the small boy reached the exit, a strong arm pulled him back. He tried to work against it but it was no use. Surrendering, he looked up to see Nigel's smug face as the arm pulled him back into the aisle before the man locked the door shut, leaving Mark no choice but to go back to his seats.

Mark felt lost, confused, hurt, but most of all he felt what he could only describe as heartbreak. It didn't quite hit him at first, but once the van started moving on to their next location (without Robbie) he slowly began to break. Tears silently started rolling down his cheeks as he felt his hands shake, his stomach no longer filled with those happy little butterflies he felt around Robbie, but instead an impure, sick feeling that twisted its way through his body.

Gary made a move now, knowing that Nigel couldn't tell him what to do as much as the others, after all, he was his main money maker and songwriter; he wouldn't fire him in a million years. Although he did make the effort to glare at him as he made his way down the aisle towards Mark He sat down next to the cowering figure sat pressed up against the window and put his hand over the younger boy's shaking fist.

"Are you okay?" He asked the question that had the most obvious answer. Mark shook his head and had to hold back a sob, Gary moving his arm around him and letting Mark take his time into accepting the hug. He soon began sobbing onto his shoulder, staying as quiet as he could but every now and then a small sound would emerge when his breathing got caught in his throat.

"It's going to be okay, Mark... somehow." He gave him a very unstable assurance. "Rob may be gone, but I'm still here to look after you. I already told him I'd never forgive him if he broke your heart. I know I tried to play cupid and bring you two together, but I don't think it would be wise for you to see him for a while... or ever."

"I think a conversation like that can wait, don't you?" The quiet mumbling of Jason droned through the van, giving his sage advice.

"Sorry, Mark... look, I know this is going to be difficult for you but we can work through this together, okay?" He rubbed Mark's back as he spoke. "I think the news is going to come as quite a shock to people, this is so sudden after all... but I think in time people can accept what happened and move on. That includes you."

"I don't want to move on." Mark's teary voice spoke. "We just got together and now Nigel has broken us apart! I'm going to just quit the band at this rate. I don't want to be here if Robbie isn't here with me!" Gary sighed as he tried to think of a way to support Mark.

"I know it's difficult, I know, Markie... but for the sake of the band, for us, for the fans... you can't just give up on us, on yourself. You'll regret that in time, and you know you will." If anything worked like a charm on Mark, it was guilt tripping him. He hated to let anyone down, especially those he was close to.

He stayed quiet for a long time, Gary giving him a moment to gather his thoughts and decide for himself what he was going to do. He didn't want Mark to leave but if he didn't think it was healthy for him to stay in the band he wouldn't force him to stay. Eventually, he moved his face from being buried in Gary's shoulder and sat up properly, wiping his tears away and taking a deep shaky breath.

"Okay... okay I'll try." He spoke bravely. "But I don't know how I'm going to cope without him."

"We'll find a way, Mark." Gary held his hand and rubbed the back of it with his thumb. "I think for now just distracting yourself with all the work we've got coming up will help." Mark nodded at that, praying to any and all gods that he could get through the next few difficult weeks.

Lord knows he tried.

It was two months after Robbie had been kicked out, Nigel forcing them to spin a lie that Robbie just couldn't cut it anymore and had left because he was sick of being in the band. They all hated covering up what really happened, especially since all of them wanted to speak out about their abusive manager and have the chance to get free of him.

They were constantly being asked questions about Robbie, no matter where they went or who spoke to them in interviews; Robbie's name would always get a mention. Today was no different.

Mark had always hated doing live TV, hating the pressure they had given that people were always watching them at that moment. He had been having a particularly bad day, having more than a few run-ins with Nigel, but no one as brave as Robbie was to stand in and defend him. It was those thoughts that were dragging him down the most.

So when Mark was asked if he missed Robbie, if he missed someone everyone could tell he was the closest to, he began to cry. He was subtle at first, only Howard noticing as he was sat right next to him. He placed his hand on his thigh to remind Mark that he was there for him, that things were going to be okay. Mark couldn't concentrate on those thoughts however, all he could focus on was biting his lip to stop himself from crying.

There he was, live on television, stressing about trying to answer the question, but couldn't force any words out his mouth. It took all but a few more seconds and he was having a breakdown live in front of thousands of viewers.

At first, nobody quite knew what to do, for a moment everyone just stared at the sobbing figure of Mark. Howard knew he wouldn't be any good at comforting Mark, he'd be fine if the one crying was Jason, but not with Mark. Usually, Robbie would be the one to comfort Mark, he was the only one who knew how to calm him and reassure him everything would be alright. But Robbie wasn't here anymore, so they had to go with next best. And that was Gary.

Jason and Howard both looked at Gary who realised it was his duty to protect Mark, he stood up and sat where Howard was and wrapped his arms tightly around Mark. Gary looked up at the TV host, who looked even more shocked than the cameramen and stage directors, and made a look as if to say 'go to an ad break'.

"Erm... I think it's best if we go to an ad break... see you after our sponsors!" He tried to look as professional as possible but it was obvious nothing like that had ever happened on his show.

Gary looked at the crew, who signalled to him that they were off air, he looked down at Mark who was now sobbing uncontrollably, his head buried in his hands.

"Markie?" Gary tried unsuccessfully.

"Markie, it's fine we're off air," he tried to console the weeping boy.

"That doesn't make it any different, I've just had a breakdown on live tv!" Mark sniffed.

"Oh come on it's not that bad..." Howard tried.

"Not that bad? What do you think this going to look like to everyone? This isn't just going to blow over, our image and basically everything is ruined. Just because I couldn't control my fucking tears," the outburst was so unexpected of Mark, that everyone was shocked into an awkward silence.

"Erm... why don't you go outside to calm down a bit eh, Mark?" Gary suggested, patting his friends back reassuringly.

Not uttering a further word, Mark stood up and stormed out, frustrated with himself more than anything. Robbie hadn't bothered to keep in contact with him, he didn't want to know now that he was out of the band and free. He was so stupid to think that he wanted to be with him - that he cared. If he didn't care, then neither did Mark... or at least that was what he was trying so desperately to tell himself.

Mark opened the door leading into the back alley, wiping his tears and sniffing. He must have looked so pathetic in front of all those viewers, and he put the poor presenter in such an awkward position. Crippled by both his self-loathing and heartbreak he slid down the wall and brought his knees to his chest, holding his head in his hands and continuing to sob out.

He felt someone place their hands on his shoulders, trying their best to comfort him in any way possible. There was a light kiss placed on his head and suddenly a hand caressing his face, forcing him to look up at whoever was in front of him. Mark's eyes widened when he did.

It was Robbie.

"Wh-what are you-" Robbie cut Mark off with a kiss to the lips, Mark melting into it instantly and moving his arms around Robbie, bringing him close to him as though his life depended on it. When he pulled back he looked into those familiar eyes, wanting to smile but he found he was only crying even harder. He punched Robbie's arm and pushed him away from him, hugging his knees again and burying his head to hide his face.

"Mark... I'm so sorry." Robbie started, placing his hand on one of Mark's. "Nigel had me threatened not to come near you, I really wanted to, I couldn't bear being apart from you like this! Especially not after what happened... I should have been there for you, I know I should have, I'm so sorry, Mark."

"I thought you didn't care about me." Mark's voice was watery and barely audible. "I thought... I thought you used this as an excuse to get away from me! That you didn't want anything to do with me anymore-"

"Don't be ridiculous!" Robbie scoffed, rubbing his thumb across the back of Mark's hand. "Look up and me, Mark." He instructed, Mark sniffing back his tears before he made any movements. When he looked up he saw Robbie was also crying and that he had a fading bruise around his eye.

"What happened to you?" He asked, concerned for his safety. He sat up now and brushed his fingertips over the bruise lightly. "Who did this?" Robbie took Mark's hand in his and moved it away from his eye, the area still slightly tender to the touch.

"One of Nigel's buddies... it's fine, I had it coming." He shrugged, Mark wanting to protest and tell him he didn't deserve any pain but Robbie got there first. "He hasn't hurt you since, has he?" Mark couldn't meet his eye, which told Robbie everything he needed to know. "Bastard!"

"Don't be mad, please, Robbie." Mark pleaded. "It's okay now! I promise!"

"He's gonna be mad at you for this though, right?" Mark felt his heart sink at that thought.

"I barely even thought about that! Oh god, he's gonna kill me for this! We're supposed to be acting strong about you leaving, not having a breakdown over it live on the telly!" Mark panicked, Robbie holding him closer.

"He's not going to lay a finger on you, I promise!" Robbie swore to that, Mark shaking his head.

"But you're not here anymore... he can just do whatever he wants now, that's sort of what we're trying to get on with." Robbie sighed at the way Mark had just given in and conformed to Nigel's ways.

"You need to get out of that, Mark... you all do." He brushed his hand against Mark's cheek. "You can't let him hurt you anymore, or else I'll-"

"You'll what?" A voice spoke up from the door to the studio. Both boy's shot their heads in the direction of the voice, finding Nigel stood there with a rather bitter expression on his face. "Always knew there was something going on between the two of you... guess this confirms it." He looked down at Mark thoughtfully, Mark seeing the various punishments he had lined up flash through his mind. "Explains the breakdown and the way you've been a completely useless wreak these past few weeks."

"What do you expect? Anyone would snap after all he's been through!" Robbie stood up now, using his height to his advantage and attempted to intimidate Nigel... of course, he knew deep down, there was no intimidating Nigel. "You get off on beating up innocent guys like Mark? Is that it?"

"Hardly worth my time trying to condition him, if I'm honest." That riled Robbie up even further. "It's not like he's ever taken anything in. Just like you, and look where it got you: jobless, and everyone is turning against you."

"Not everyone." Mark stood up now, standing beside him and holding his hand. "Not me."

"We'll see." Nigel scoffed, giving Robbie a quick glance over. "Won't be long and he'll be forgotten anyway... it's ironic how you're all helping to do that, isn't it?"

"After seeing Mark breaking down like that over me I doubt people are going to be thinking they're as over it as you've tried to make it seem, don't you?" Robbie spoke smugly.

"Yes... we'll be having words about that later." Nigel gave a menacing look to Mark now, the smaller boy hiding behind Robbie slightly.

"No you won't." Robbie insisted. "Because he's coming with me."

"What!?" Mark and Nigel both spoke at the same time.

"You heard me." Robbie took Mark's hand in his and gave it a small squeeze. "You're not going to hurt him no more, and you're not going to milk the other lads for as much money as you can get any more... not unless you want word to get out about all you've done to us over the years!" He threatened, Nigel's face contorting to a look of rage.

"You wouldn't dare Williams!" Nigel stepped closer to them, Robbie standing protectively in front of Mark like he always would. "I could end you in a heartbeat and you know it... not just career wise either." That threat frightened Robbie slightly, even though he didn't dare show it. Nigel had already shown that he knew the wrong sort of people and had set a few of them after him since he left the band just to keep him in check and silenced... he didn't doubt any of them would silence him permanently.

It was there in that situation that Mark came to a sudden realisation: Robbie had always been fighting his battles. Ever since day one of the band, Robbie had always been there for Mark, always supporting him and making sure he was safe... it was time he returned the favour.

Mark pulled Robbie back and instead moved in front of him. "You want to get to him you have to go through me." Mark's voice somehow didn't shake as he spoke, he was terrified deep down. "He's right. You don't get to hurt me anymore! You don't own me! I'm not some little kid you can just push around and make do whatever you want!" Robbie was incredibly proud of Mark for finally standing up for himself.

"I'm sorry, Mark, but you are a little kid and I do own you. I'm your manager. You're nothing without me." Nigel clearly took pride in saying those words. Mark just wanted to wipe that smug look off of his face.

"You don't own me if I quit," Mark said simply. "I'm not worth anything in this band anyway, or so you always say. So I guess you won't miss having me around, right?" Mark didn't want to leave the band, it was all he knew, but if it meant getting free of Nigel and being able to stay with Robbie then he would do anything, even if it meant throwing away his career.

"People will just think you couldn't hack it anymore after that breakdown. You're not going to be missed if that's the trick you're trying to pull." Nigel was trying to maintain the upper hand but both boys could see he was a little shaken by Mark's threat.

"What if I could convince the others to leave too? How about that?" Mark challenged, Nigel raising his eyebrow at him. "Jason would definitely leave if I put the idea in his head, he's sick of you too... and if Jason goes then so does Howard. You can't just have Gary in the band, imagine the bad publicity. It would completely run your name into the ground as a manager."

"Jason's completely useless anyway, and Howard's no better. Gary can sing in tune at least so I can still manage him in his solo career." Nigel shrugged, Mark hating what he was hearing but was glad he had said that in a way.

"Is that really what you think of us, Nigel?" Jason spoke from behind him, Nigel freezing up and couldn't turn to meet the three other band member's eyes. "Because if that's how you feel I might just take up Mark's offer of leaving."

"And me." Howard chimed in. "I mean, we weren't planning on going on much longer anyway." 

That just left Gary.

Mark and Robbie gave him a hopeful look, both of them worried when he looked like he was seriously considering the decision he was about to make.

"You know, Nigel, I know you've always thought bad of the rest of the band... but it really hurts to hear you talking about us like we're nothing but money makers to you. I don't know why we hadn't come to this agreement sooner... I'm out."

Mark's smile grew at that, the sight angering Nigel and the man took a stride towards him. "You can't do this to me! I can sue you for this! Trying to ruin my reputation like this is slander!" He roared, Mark not backing down like he used to.

"Go ahead." He shrugged. "Because the moment you try and sue us you're going to look the villain. You'll be doing all the reputation ruining yourself." 

Blinded with rage, Nigel grabbed Mark's collar and shoved him past Robbie and against the wall, the small boy giving a surprised yelp. The man threw a punch at Mark's stomach while using his other hand to keep Robbie away. The punches that kept coming at Mark made him double over in pain as he heard screams and shouts, deep down knowing that now Nigel had started he wouldn't stop easily.

Jason thought quick though, he whispered something to Howard before rushing back into the building.

Gary looked towards the street, his hands still on Nigel's arm in an attempt to stop him, gasping when he saw two huge men heading right for them. One of the thugs grabbed Robbie and Howard and the other grabbed a shocked Gary. Mark was now leaning against the wall, begging for Nigel to stop. He was covered in his own blood which flowed freely from various parts of his body and there were pain-filled tears escaping from his eyes.

A few moments later, Jason finally burst out from the building, a full crew behind him, cameras on and broadcasting live. The boy moved out of the way, letting everyone spill into the alleyway, the crew trying to get the men off the boys. The police and ambulance were called and finally, Nigel and his two thugs were restrained.

Robbie rushed towards Mark who was curled in a ball on the floor, sobbing. He took the small boy and held him in his arms, tears falling past his eyes when he felt Mark's arms wrapping around his own body.

"I'm so sorry Robbie, I'm so sorry... I t-tried to stop h-him b-but he just kept c-coming b-b-back at m-me." Mark sobbed, the pain still killing him.

"It's not your fault, god, please don't blame yourself. You did amazing, seriously the way you stood up for us...for me, I mean wow. I just wish you didn't get hurt, you don't deserve this shit, you're too good for this stuff. You're kind, amazing and caring and lovely, nobody deserves you, I don't deserve you. I should have been the one to get hurt like that, I've done nothing but been a nuisance to everybody. This wouldn't have happened if I-" Robbie paused abruptly when he saw Mark pull away from him, giving the small boy look of confusion before he felt a pair of lips covering his own. He smiled into the kiss and cupped Mark's face, making sure that he didn't touch any bruises, the small boy curling his hands around Robbie's lower arms in response.

When they pulled away, Mark's face immediately went bright red as he realised everyone was watching and the cameras were still rolling. Robbie looked around and he saw Gary, Howard and Jason stood together, smirking. His eyes went to Nigel who had a look of anger on his face, and the two thugs next to him were being handcuffed. He looked back at Mark who smiled, Robbie smiling back.

Suddenly the smile on Mark's face was replaced by a serious look and that look soon turned to one of pain. "Mark?" Robbie grew even more concerned now.

"I don't... I don't feel t-too good." He spoke dizzily, grunting in pain as he gripped his stomach where Nigel had caused him to bleed. "D-don't... I... f-feel..." The small boy suddenly collapsed to the side, his head painfully hitting the concrete of the alley.

"Mark?!" Robbie screamed, trying to hold his hand and assure him he was going to be okay but a team of doctors surrounded him, moving him out of the way. The boy tried to protest, but he was pulled back by a few strong hands, that he recognised as Howard's. He looked up and saw the tall boy mouthing 'Don't' which he obeyed.

Everyone waited with bated breath as the doctors fiddled around moving from the ambulance to Mark from time to time. The camera still rolled, the TV host from earlier quietly commentating from behind the cameraman. Robbie was glad they were able to use the camera to catch out Nigel, but was now disgusted with how they were putting what had happened into the public view. Mark looked a sorry state, blood all over him, and Robbie knew younger viewers who were a fan of the band would be watching this. He didn't want them to see that.

"We're losing him!" A doctor shouted, another running to the ambulance as he did so.

"No!" Robbie shouted, trying to move towards his friend, being stopped just in time by Jason. He suddenly gave no concern to the TV crew, to Nigel giving him glares or to the paramedics who had tried to hold him back. He wanted to get near Mark again, to hold his hand and tell him his tortures were over now, he didn't have to be hurt anymore... he couldn't die like this. Not now.

The doctor who had gone to the ambulance now returned with what Robbie recognised as a defibrillator. Most of the crowd around Mark now moved away, leaving only two doctors to work. Robbie noticed the small heart monitor that was propped up next to Mark's unconscious body, being attached to his finger to measure his pulse but displayed only a straight line.

"Clear!" One of the doctors spoke once the defibrillator was charged, moving it down to Mark's chest and shocking his body. It lifted his body up all but a few inches from the force of the shock but did nothing when it came to restarting his heart.

"Clear!" Another shock. Still a flat line.

Another shock.

Another.

Yet another.

Robbie couldn't take it any longer, he looked away and hid his face in the crook of Howard's neck, the older boy hugging him tightly to comfort him. Neither he, Jason or Gary could seem to take their eyes off the heart monitor, all of them waiting with baited breath for some form of life from their friend.

The doctors both looked up at each other, one shaking his head with a gloomy look on his face, the other sighing and trying once more with the defibrillator.

"Come on Markie... come back to me... you can't leave me! Not now! We can finally be together! We don't have to hide it anymore..." Robbie was whispering to Mark, knowing it wouldn't reach his ears but he still kept repeating 'don't leave me' like a mantra.

Then there was a sound, a low groan as there was a beep on the heart monitor. Then another. Then there was a slow and very unstable pattern but it was enough for Robbie to slowly turn his head back towards Mark, seeing his head tilted towards him and his eyes half open.

"Markie?" He edged forward just slightly.

"Rob... Ro... Robbie." He was alive.

"We need t get him to the hospital right now. We could lose him again if we don't hurry and get these wounds treated." One of the doctors told them as the other, and one of the paramedics moved Mark onto a stretcher.

Robbie held his hands over his mouth, completely stunned by what he was seeing, mostly stunned that Nigel would almost kill Mark like that. He was so glad he decided to come back, he dreaded to think what would have happened if he hadn't. As he glared over to him, the disgusting man just being forced into the back of the police car he asked if he could go with Mark in the ambulance, the paramedics allowing it and taking Mark over to the vehicle. Robbie stayed mostly out of the way as they worked on treating some of the more serious wounds, but he never let go of Mark's hand for the entire journey.

Mark was unconscious for the most part. He did stir every now and then, his eyes rolling around and trying to figure out what was going on, but he could barely keep them open for long. He would pass out again after giving a few small groans of pain and trying to put some strength to his hand that was being held by Robbie. He wanted to hold him back, to hug him and thank him for freeing him, but he couldn't move and fell quickly back into darkness.

Mark was taken into recovery when they arrived at the hospital, Robbie not allowed to go with him and instead had to wait out in the waiting room, all the while he tried his very best to hold himself together and not cry.

He was joined by Jason and Howard not too long after he had arrived, Howard hugging him and telling him he would be alright while Jason went to fetch them some coffee from the machine. When he returned Howard and Robbie were sat on the chairs, both showing their nerves in their body language. He handed them both their coffee and sat down the other side of Robbie.

"Gary's doing an interview with the TV crew." He explained his absence. "He's telling them everything Nigel has done since day one, especially to Mark. He's told them the real reason why you left the band too... Nigel's finished after this."

"That's good to hear." Robbie was relieved to hear it but it didn't show in his voice. "I just wished we could have found a way to do all this without Mark-" He cut himself off as he sobbed, Jason rubbing his back to show support. "Without Mark... what if he dies? What will we do? This is all my fault!"

"This isn't anyone's fault, Rob... no one's but Nigel's." Howard assured him, giving Jason a subtle look to try and figure out what to do or say next. They couldn't assure him that Mark wasn't going to die because they weren't entirely sure. After seeing him lying there in that alleyway bleeding out and having paramedics use a defibrillator on him several times before his heart started beating again... well, his future didn't look so certain, that was the only certainty.

"I should have done something sooner... I'm sorry guys. You've all been through hell because of me." Robbie rubbed the tears from his eyes in an attempt to calm down.

"We're free because of you... you and Mark." Jason corrected him. "If you two hadn't had stood up against Nigel like that we'd all still be stuck in that band... if you hadn't have come back when you did Nigel would have been able to do what he did to Mark in the privacy of a hotel room. God knows what he could have done to him."

"I never thought I'd see Mark stand up to Nigel like that." Howard thought back to the moment he went out into the alleyway to see Mark standing protectively in front of Robbie and sending threats to his manager that were all but empty. "He's always been terrified of him."

"With good reason." A voice spoke from the corridor, Gary emerging. "Bastard did anything he could to hurt him... but that's finally all over now." He sat down on the chair next to Howard. "Any news on Mark?"

"Nothing yet," Robbie informed sadly. "This waiting is driving me insane!"

"No news is good news I suppose." Gary sighed, sitting back in the chair and staring up at the ceiling. "I just hope he's okay."

Half an hour later a nurse appeared in the waiting room, approaching them and giving them that warm smile all staff members had managed to master in the face of terrified friends and family. "We've managed to get him into a stable condition and stitched up all his wounds."

"He's gonna be okay, right?" Robbie asked nervously.

"My daughter is a huge fan of the band, she'd have me hung if I didn't make sure he'd be right as rain." She smiled to Robbie, "He's not out of the woods yet, he's got to take it easy for a few weeks before doing much activity... but yes, he's okay."

"Can I - er, we see him?" He just wanted to hold his hand again, desperate to see his face and tell him how much he loved him.

"At the moment we can only let one person into the room, if you want to decide who that is now I'll take you there."

"No need, go on Rob." Jason patted his back, Robbie looking to the others for confirmation first before following the nurse into Mark's room.

Mark lay asleep on the bed, looking frail and bruised, but he was alive; that was all that mattered to Robbie. He was left alone by the nurse after they had checked a few things over, Robbie then taking to sitting on the chair next to the bed. He placed his hand in Mark's and gave it a small squeeze.

"Markie? Can you hear me?" He wanted to let him sleep and get rest so he could recover, but at the same time, he wanted him to assure him that he would be okay.

"Mmh?" Mark hummed in a low tone, blinking his eyes open and slowly adjusting to the light of the hospital room. "Robbie?"

"I'm here, Markie... you're okay now." He gave him a smile and lifted his hand up his lips, pressing a kiss to his to his knuckles.

"I don't feel it." He groaned, moving his free hand to his stomach, tentatively pressing his fingers down where it hurt. "Everything hurts."

"Aw, I know, buddy... but it's gonna be fine. Nigel's been arrested. He's not gonna hurt you no more!" Mark seemed confused at that for a moment, looking to Robbie to see if he was just lying to save his fears. He couldn't really remember much of what happened outside in the alleyway, only remembering being hit again and again and passing out not too long after.

"Really?" He couldn't believe it.

"And... well, you kissed me in front of a live camera, so we don't have to hide anything anymore either." Mark's eyes lit up at that. "We're free."

"You really mean that? We... we can be together in public? We don't have to... we... we're free?" Robbie nodded and leaned forward, kissing Mark on the lips, pressing lightly however as though he was some sort of fragile object that would break upon the slightest of touches.

"We're free."

Those words were a driving force in Mark's road to recovery. It was a long one, not just physically either but mentally too. Mark had to adjust to not having to look over his shoulder at every turn, to not have to constantly give his best in anything he did in case he would receive a strike from Nigel. Given time, however, Mark managed to turn himself around, to smile again and mean it. He was able to love Robbie and not have to feel as though people were going to tear them apart.

The two of them were able to look back on things as time went on, to the time when they had those unspoken words between them that were so desperate to break free. It was almost as if their relationship was the catalyst to giving them their happiness that they so thoroughly deserved.

There was a lot of pain, sadness and suffering to get them to this point, but they knew now it was all worth it. As they had each other now, they were happy, and that was all they had ever wanted since that first day at the auditions.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading xx


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